vacation
What I Learned about Motivation on My Summer Vacation
I’ve just returned from a two-week vacation in Israel, Jordan and Spain – and I am writing this email saddled with incredible jet lag, some squishy new love handles made from gelato, falafel and Manchego cheese, and many beautiful memories to last a lifetime.
What made this trip so special for me? My sole travel companion was my 15-year-old son, Jacob.
I knew that we would both enjoy sampling the local cuisines (luckily, gelato is always a local cuisine), taking history tours, shopping, swimming, and just wandering around. And I also knew that this trip would benefit from planning beyond flights, excursions, and lodging. It would require us to shift from a task focus (the what, where, when, and how of getting the trip off the ground) to a relationship focus (the who we were — separately and together – and why we were choosing to do this together.)
Admittedly, it’s that kind of focus that busy, driven people who are motivated by getting things crossed off their to-do lists often neglect — and the costs of that neglect include the loss of connection, collaboration, ownership, engagement, and meaning.
I didn’t want to look back on this trip and only be proud of what we did, where we went and how we got there. I wanted to look back on this trip and be proud of who we were and what we built together.
Can you think of a partnership or team you work on (or live with) that could benefit from a little more of that?
Here are 10 questions I asked my son and myself before our trip that you can bring to your next staff meeting, board meeting or Labor Day vacation.
- What’s our purpose for doing this?
- What could we do that would have each of us jump out of bed in the morning with excitement to get started?
- What would make each of us want to crawl back into bed and say, “I’ll pass”?
- What have we done in the past that we want to make sure we repeat?
- What have we done in the past that we want to make sure we don’t repeat?
- What do we each want to learn/get better at/get smarter about?
- How might we veto something that one of us really doesn’t like/doesn’t want to do?
- How should we let the other person know when we’re feeling stressed/sad/tired/overwhelmed/frustrated?
- How should we ask for personal time/space without it feeling “personal”?
- What would we want our sound bite about this [project/task/challenge/opportunity/trip] to be a month after? Six months after? A year after? 10 years after?
There Once was a Little Old Lady
–>
TXTNG WHL DRVNG
As my husband Michael and I were heading to JFK airport, envisioning the sun, sand and frosty beverages of our upcoming “no work allowed” weekend in St. Martin, I peeked into the car to our right to see a frightening sight.
“Michael,” I exclaimed in horror. “That guy over there is driving with his knees while he texts!”
Michael turned to me, eyebrow raised. “Jealous?”
Boy does he know me. Boy oh boy.
So here are my two pledges, beginning immediately:
No work on vacations — it’s bad for my relationships, my mental health and for my own business
No texting while driving — it’s bad for my safety and the safety of those around me
Now call me an overachiever (please…do!), but I think we could all benefit from identifying ONE habit we need to attend to immediately for your own health, wellbeing or safety.
What’s yours?
Deborah
www.myjewishcoach.com
www.jewishorganizations.blogspot.com
www.myjewishcoach.blogspot.com
Looking forward to Freckles: My Day Before Vacation
I finally did it:
I used some of the frequent flier miles I have been hoarding for years and booked a NON-WORK TRIP WITHOUT THE KIDS (see that, honey? I didn’t feel a little bit faint this time!)
Michael and I are going to St. Martin. And St. Maarten. And we’ll probably pop over to Anguilla — because we can. Four days. No kids. But at a hotel with internet access (sorry, hon!!!)
So here are the questions that got me to this trip…
- What can I do to better manage my work and my life?
- Who am I outside of work?
- To what extent does work define me?
…and When am I going to schedule another break from work?
What are your answers? I’d love to know! But not this weekend….
Deborah
www.myjewishcoach.com
www.jewishorganizations.blogspot.com
www.myjewishcoach.blogspot.com